LIFESTYLE NEWS - If you’re drowning in devices, but politeness is in short supply, it’s time to get back to basics…
You started with the best intentions. Your kid needed a laptop for homework. Your tween needed a phone to text you after school. You wanted a Fitbit to lose a few extra pounds. But now, you look around and devices are plugged into every nook and cranny in your home.
Everyone’s staring, tapping, tracking. While you’re grateful for things like Google Maps and Netflix that make your life easier and more fun, something feels off.
It’s the basics that are missing: Courtesy, conversation, being bored, and appreciating simple pleasures.
But all hope is not lost. You may have to take another look at how your family is using tech and make adjustments based on your values. But you can do it.
Here are ways tech has nibbled away at valuable life skills and experiences, and what you can do about it:
Home assistants vs. manners
If you are one of the millions of households with Alexa or Google Home, you may have noticed an unfortunate side effect of using the device: a lack of enforced courtesy. Kids (and adults) shout commands at the device: “Play Beyoncé!” or “What’s the weather?!” The devices do not require a “please” or “thank you”, and the more lifelike these devices become, the weirder it is to hear your child rudely demanding something from a human-like voice.
What to do:
Model the behaviour you want to see. It might feel strange to say “please” to a machine, but if that’s what you expect from your kid, you should do it too. It might help explain to kids that even though you know Alexa doesn’t have feelings, using polite voices and words makes it nicer for the real people in the house who do have feelings. You can talk about how it can feel bad to be around someone who’s yelling or angry, even if they’re not yelling at you.
Phones vs. respect for elders
How many of us have witnessed a teacher, coach, or grandparent try to make conversation with kids who can’t un-glue their eyes from a screen? Of course it’s only polite to put down your phone when anyone is talking to you, but it can be especially embarrassing for parents who were raised to defer to the older generation.
What to do:
Make your expectations very clear. Talk to your kids about how important it is to use good manners when you’re on your phone. Explain that it can be very difficult to put down your phone when you’re in the middle of a game or chat, but you believe it’s important to pay special respect to people like grandparents and elders.
And of course, respect breeds respect, so put your phone down when your kid talks to you (unless it’s about how much redstone they need to build a castle in Minecraft, in which case it’s totally OK to ignore them!).
